notes on LOVE: day 1

"i have come to test the timber of my heart" (hymn #101, joe pug)

i would like to say a word or two about love.

no time or energy that you spend loving someone is wasted.

no matter if they don't love you back.

no matter if they're busy loving someone else.

not even if they don't even know you exist.

because when you love someone, you learn what love is.

you learn how to love.

you learn what it feels like

and who it makes you want to become

and you build a store(y) of ideas and places and conversations and hopes

of things you want to share with them.

and sharing is always a good thing.

the motion of loving is never futile.

so do not worry that your loving is damaging you.

it's the shriveling that you need to worry about

--the holding your heart so close to your chest--

because loving someone means your heart is open

your life is open

to letting someone come in

and become part of you.

and when you open you like that,

because you are busy loving someone,

then when the right someone does come around

you've done a good job of making sure you're ready

because of all this time you've spent spending your love.

even heartbreak is useful,

heartbreak is just a way to carve out a space big enough inside

so that you have room to hold

all the people you have loved along the way,

all your stories,

all your wisdom,

and all that much happiness

when the someone you love loves you too.

that's what i say.