friends or...friendlier?

last night i found myself unexpectedly explaining the stories that explain me to someone i've only known a little while. in the moment, i thought nothing of it for how natural it felt. only when i went home did i realize how completely rare that is for me: seldom do i really tell stories about how i got to be who i am to people i've known for a long time, let alone to people i've known for so little. makes you far too vulnerable. i went to bed utterly happy for a friend so genuine that this girl eager to listen, reluctant to share, could feel so at ease,

and then today i cried on the phone with another of my friends. a best one, this. people never guess we're best friends, i suppose because at first glance we're quite opposite.

i have brown hair | she has blonde.

she has a high, feminine voice | mine has moments of husky, especially in the mornings.

she's the best conversationalist i've ever known | i struggle to say anything sometimes.

she likes all things pink | i don't.

her hair is always, as we say, perfectly coiffed | sometimes i go a whole week only braiding my hair (sorry for those weeks, world).

you get the picture. and yet in all the things that matter, we couldn't be more similar. the most important thing of which being that we just really care about each other. knowing her has given me so much hope in the future and hope in who i am. what an irreplaceable person to know.

and then there's my darling roommate, who knew i was anxiously preparing a presentation, and offered to let me practice on her. and when i took a nap she closed the door for me cause i forgot, and came in to wake me up when it was time. in coming out of my sleep, i thought, i don't have to worry about anything right now--roommate's got my back. everyone needs a support like that in their life.

there's my new-found music-swapping kindred spirit,

my dinner group amigos,

diana who is lovely beyond words and thoughtful the same,

the courtney & meredith who i never ever ever want to leave,

(by the, i mean the, because these girls are one of a kind)

and laura who teaches me about enthusiasm and femininity and making friends.

literally every one of my roommates from the last six years, who are patient, and forgiving, and support my silly party ideas and stay up sometimes to laugh or to cry, depending, and validate everything about me in such a caring, selfless way.

and of course: the friends old like trees from my childhood or old like trees from just last year that feel like friends from childhood, who still call or message, despite the distance. those who all my most important memories are with,

to all of my friends: you are the people that there is something to. people of substance, of wholeness, of great love. people who inspire me to read more books, to keep my chin up, to giggle more often, to trust more openly, to be the kind of stalwart friend and indefatigable support that each of you have been to me.

thank you,

more pictures forthcoming.