Wednesday, February 11, 2009

levels of love

SUBTITLED: "the greatest courage is growing up and becoming who you really are." (e.e. cummings)

today with my class we were talking bout all the different ways you can love someone. infatuation, adoration, worshipping, and so forth.

tangent: i [love] this university. i was on campus tonight for a grand induction (wootwoot) and i realized how long it has been since i've been on campus. last semester, i thought i'd be up in the library every night, preparing lesson plans, mostly as an excuse to be back in that library that i love so much. why have i not gone back? i think it's because some part of me doesn't want to face it. subconsciously i think that if i avoid it for long enough, i won't really have to say goodbye. like relations with old, old friends. it's hard to see them because you realize how much you miss them in your life. how completely un-ready you were to be parted. hard things to face. i don't know that i will ever really come to terms with having to hand over this chapter of my life.  

some of you may be laughing. perhaps it is rather gross this adoration|adulation of mine.  or maybe it serves a purpose.  only time will tell.

also. i have a new theory. a developing theory, rather. it is the theory of imagination. i believe imagination creates reality, in direct proportion to just how detailed the imagination is. in other words, our capacity to imagine has the power to bring about realities. from steve dahlberg's blog, "Protecting imagination is even more important in realms beyond entertainment. Progress in arenas from social reform to technological invention would be crippled if people lost their ability to imagine a better world. Tolerance and empathy depend upon the human capacity to imagine all the implications of the Golden Rule."

in practice:  two night ago i imagined a certain someone into calling me.  tonight, paige and i imagined another certain someone coming over to our apartment so vividly, that as the him in our imagination was knocking on our door, there came a real knock on our door.  in the very instant.  it wasn't the him we'd imagined, but i still give our creative energy credit.  then, we ran into the real him a few minutes afterwards.  after a short convo with said boy, it turns out that he had gone through almost the exact same process on the way to the party that we'd imagined, just minutes before.  he was typing in his room, he left for the party, he forgot his shoes halfway down the stairs and had to go back from them, etc., etc.  (or ect ect as my students say)  power of imagination?  coincidence?  i don't know...we're still experimenting.

which leads me to another dissertation for the evening.  perhaps i should have titled this blog the rants and raves of a curious girl.  anyways, was talking with teachfriend today: lovely conversation about how great the highschoolies are at hyperbole.  everything is exaggerated in their minds.  i think this should connect to my life in a bigger way than i see right now.  so there it is, written down to reconnect to at some later date.

No comments:

Post a Comment