tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post2366549313735202777..comments2023-12-06T01:47:42.175-07:00Comments on what a lovely: and this one's on loveCarolynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17575891383320251383noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-90831173801628375212012-10-05T08:41:08.002-06:002012-10-05T08:41:08.002-06:00Bronwyn: so glad you're here! Now we can be bl...Bronwyn: so glad you're here! Now we can be blog friends and mutually commiserate about our frustration with our bangs, our love of Nutella, and our willingness to do anything to avoid writing research papers. Cheers!Carolynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17575891383320251383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-3514743643934287492012-10-05T01:11:55.209-06:002012-10-05T01:11:55.209-06:00"aren't serious conversations beautiful? ..."aren't serious conversations beautiful? aren't those when you feel like someone is really validating who you are, seeing things as you do, stretching themselves to understand who you are? isn't that where true friendship--friendship, not even relationship--comes in, when you've spent enough one-on-one time with another person that you know how they tick? how they think? how they feel about things? that never comes out--not really--in hanging out. all you learn are things like what their favorite youtube videos are and how many doughnuts they can eat in one sitting."<br /><br />Okay. I don't know who you are. I don't remember how I stumbled upon your blog and I don't know why I've spent the past hour reading various posts instead of working on my research paper. What I do know is that you have perfectly described exactly how I've always felt but have been incapable of putting into words. How can I adequately thank you for this?Bronwyn Elisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15589778837250622398noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-53501128432566416092012-10-05T01:06:38.426-06:002012-10-05T01:06:38.426-06:00This comment has been removed by the author.Bronwyn Elisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15589778837250622398noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-50274538504610436102011-12-21T08:07:31.669-07:002011-12-21T08:07:31.669-07:00I had to tell you: your post reminded me of an exp...I had to tell you: your post reminded me of an experience that I haven't thought of in quite some time.<br /><br />A few years ago after I had met my (now) husband but before we started dating, a mutual friend invited a group of us over for an evening of hanging out. I don't remember many of the details about the evening, but I wasn't feeling very gregarious that night, and I remember it being quite painful to watch other more gregariously-inclined girls talking to and laughing with Luke. I came away from the evening feeling as though it would have been better if I hadn't gone, but being in that situation and feeling the way I did probably helped me admit to myself how really interested I was.<br /><br />On a related note, in those early days of our acquaintance, Luke rarely came to hang out with the rest of us. Though he and I talked on the phone a few time a week, I think we were only in the same "hang out" situation two or three times before our first date.<br /><br />Thanks for your thought-provoking post. I think you have it just right. :)Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03394802543363378386noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-3423895716733225872011-12-20T10:58:05.487-07:002011-12-20T10:58:05.487-07:00Wow, thanks for all the comments, guys. Funny how...Wow, thanks for all the comments, guys. Funny how many people feel unkool huh. I'm glad I'm not the only one. :)<br /><br />And dear anonymous, I totally agree with you--different things work for different people, and I am definitely not any sort of an expert on this subject, so I appreciate your insights. <br /><br />Maybe we should all just get pompadours and hang out together! (just kidding, just kidding. But kinda serious about the pompadours.)Carolynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17575891383320251383noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-59239913465897772342011-12-20T09:25:25.623-07:002011-12-20T09:25:25.623-07:00I've felt so similar multiple times when in a ...I've felt so similar multiple times when in a group and always had to remind myself that I just wasn't a "hang out" person and that it's perfectly OK to be a "one-on-one" person. Well thought out and well said, Carolyn.Lisa Ogleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03629128271196169477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-77836809161378272752011-12-20T08:21:28.660-07:002011-12-20T08:21:28.660-07:00Everyone's an expert, right? Especially if the...Everyone's an expert, right? Especially if they got married once? 20+ years ago? They know exactly how dating works these days.<br /><br />I think Stevie Nicks's lyrics are applicable: "It's only right for you to play the way you feel it." One thing works for one person, one thing works for another. Some guys like initial hanging-out because it allows them to make better informed choices on who to go on dates with. Some guys prefer a cold call. I don't think one is better than the other, except which girl is being pursued.<br /><br />And because I have only hung out with you and never gone on a date with you, I can definitely say you are a "kool hanger-outer."Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00876266528715403001noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-85811961144052868072011-12-20T08:11:19.792-07:002011-12-20T08:11:19.792-07:00Thanks for the post carolyn! Also, to echo what so...Thanks for the post carolyn! Also, to echo what some others are saying, I am shocked that you don't see yourself as a hang-out person. I've always seen you as an expert! So even if you don't always feel like the coolest, prettiest, funniest, you have the rest of us fooled, because you end up that way anyhow :)ktbhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06386176067622030705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-28350957175127534962011-12-20T05:46:00.061-07:002011-12-20T05:46:00.061-07:00This is a great comment-- and so true that marriag...This is a great comment-- and so true that marriage comes down to two people spending a lot of time together. <br /><br />But I think your comments about not being Kool are interesting because I totally thought you were the epitome of Kool-- well, maybe not the epitome because you were well-liked, and socially capable, and out-going, AND incredibly nice. But interesting that you don't see yourself that way. <br /><br />But then I saw you that way and also thought that probably not that many people knew you REALLY well, so even people who are really capable in hanging-out situations have more to them that has to be found out in more intimate settings.Keeganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11316961214186285743noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-72336811987568481432011-12-20T01:53:28.059-07:002011-12-20T01:53:28.059-07:00I can't even explain why I like this so much.I can't even explain why I like this so much.Coby Gerstnerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06951300649391352337noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-49106995296090509812011-12-20T00:51:52.158-07:002011-12-20T00:51:52.158-07:00As I'm watching Jane Eyre for the 1st time eve...As I'm watching Jane Eyre for the 1st time ever, I feel somehow qualified to comment. ;) I enjoyed the post. It was an opinion piece seeming to stem from years of thought on the subject.<br /><br />As one on the other side, I'm wondering what you, and any others, think about providing both fair trials and swift judgements for suitors. I've attempted dating, versus hanging out, with many, as that is the counsel. However, determining temperature, for me and I imagine many others, has always been a struggle. How is one to know, when so many approach it differently?The Jakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07494400625509819347noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-9798860439483974582011-12-20T00:44:01.837-07:002011-12-20T00:44:01.837-07:00Sometimes I'm really glad your posts still com...Sometimes I'm really glad your posts still come up on my google reader. Great thoughts and writing. I agree on every point :)brycehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03260441953070415244noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-72725964553532321962011-12-20T00:27:19.315-07:002011-12-20T00:27:19.315-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Sylvia Louisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07251820747903121344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-1396102765735502042011-12-19T23:06:20.700-07:002011-12-19T23:06:20.700-07:00AMEN SISTER!
Love this post. 100% agree with the b...AMEN SISTER!<br />Love this post. 100% agree with the benefits of hanging out AND one-on-one time. So importante. <br />Also, I love that you are a one-on-one person because that is my favorite way to get to know people. Love it! I also love groups of 3 or 4...don't know why but that has always been a good number for me.<br />One problem: if you think for a second that I believe you can't be the cool and funny one you are sorely mistaken missy.<br />K, that was my two cents. After break play time is coming up! Be ready!Chelsea Kelleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12148226253043800768noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6434822253556500066.post-86392452359186307792011-12-19T23:00:08.699-07:002011-12-19T23:00:08.699-07:00amen.
to all of the above!
Seriously Carolyn.
This...amen.<br />to all of the above!<br />Seriously Carolyn.<br />This was like music to my ears! well said.Laurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00312388051054196470noreply@blogger.com